because every breath i take proves that i can live without you.

A thing is mighty big when time and distance cannot shrink it.

you must have been just a product of my wildest imagination. i hope to stop fantasizing now.

Your Playing Small does not Serve the World

*my guiding words ;)

 

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure
It is our light, not our darkness that frightens us

We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous,
talented and fabulous?
Actually who are you not to be?
You are a child of God

Your playing small does not serve the world
There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other
people won’t feel insecure around you
We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us

It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone
And as we let our own light shine we unconsciously give
other people the right to do the same
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence
automatically liberates others.

There is one thing everybody wants to feel: to be loved without begging for it.

I don't know what I'm in love with anymore, you or the memories.

I know I need to let you go, I'm just not sure how to.

the investment side of giving

If i am not mistaken, people are required to give 10% of what they receive to anyone in the society especially to our less fortunate brothers.  this, as what the bible refers to it, is called tithing. Additionally, it is a famous saying that when you give, it will return to you in a hundred folds.

Mathematically speaking, combining both ideas, if you initially have 100 and give 10 pesos as the 10% tithe, you get a thousand pesos which is the hundred folds of the 10 pesos that you gave. This is 100 times than what you give and 10 times more than what you initially have.

Therefore, it is not only good to give, it is also wiser to. :P

how do i love you?

how do i love you?

let me count the ways.

i love you on your very best

and the very worst of days.

i love to see you laughing

i love the way you stare.

and even if you forget my name,

i love you just the same.

i love to see you dance.

i love to see you smile.

i love the way you take each day

in your own unhurried style.

i’m happy when you’re happy,

and i’m sorry when you’re sad.

and even though it may not show,

i love you when you’re bad.

how do i love you?

well, now, let me see..

i love the way you stand up

and fight for what you believe.

yet stay as gentle as one can be.

i love how you let me be.

i love to watch you sleeping,

tucked away in pleasant dreams.

i love to hear you whisper

all your giant plans and schemes.

i love your big shirts i wear

although they really fit you well.

i love how calm and composed you can be

even when it already feels like hell.

i love how comical you can be

and still maintain your poise.

i love how you can simply take

all my noise.

i love how you make me laugh,

i love how you make me sing,

i love how you never fail to amaze me

i love the joy you bring.

i love the woman i become when i’m with you

-independent, strong and free

i love the way you make me me

i love the way you caress my face

and how you wipe worries away.

i love to see you deep in thought.

i love to watch you play.

and though i’m sure you’ll never know,

i love you more each day.

how do i love you?

it’s impossible to say.

for if i had a million days

and time enough for all the praise,

i couldn’t tell you all the ways...

i love you.`                                                                                                                              

i figured..

that in the end nothing really matters.

that you can still get nothing after doing everything.

that loving is staying away to give one the freedom
he so wanted,
he so deserved.

that i was a part of your life over and gone.

(written: September 8, 2011)

i am sorry. terribly sorry.

Discovering Southern Leyte

September 7. At 5am, i was already in the New Bus Terminal hoping to get a van at 530am to Sogod for our first stop, Agas-agas Bridge.  Time wasn’t on my side. we had to wait until 7am until the van left making us 2 hours behind schedule.

And so we (I plus Jason and Monica) arrived in Agas-agas at 9am and were welcomed warmly by the Zipline staff.  They even demonstrated to us how it really is to zipline in exchange for promoting it in Tacloban which i would gladly do anyway.

we took a habalhabal (motorbike for 5 passengers) bound to Sogod for 30 minutes.  It was 35 pesos ride plus free squeezed bodies and aching muscles everywhere. :P

we directly went to the municipal officer to interview about the ecotourism in Sogod which was the main reason for the travel but not the main point of this blog. so, we will skip these details. :) afterwards, they toured us to the port of Sogod which was a part of the great Sogod bay that stretches from this town to that. (i don’t really remember the names of the town).

After was a very cheap but tasty lunch in May Ann ( i am not sure again with the name.) i had vegetables plus pork and half rice only worth Php30.00. i wish lunch in Tacloban was as cheap as this. and the place was even airconditioned!

We took the next jeepney to Padre Burgos and went down to Sogod Bay Diving Resort after an hour ride. I enjoyed the scenery while my groupmates were busy interviewing the staff and taking pictures of the place. :)

next was as trike ride to the port of Limasawa hoping that we could get a trip to Limasawa at 2pm.  It was possible though but the next trip back was the following morning which wasn’t an option.  So we all decided to drop the trip to Limasawa and rode multicab to Maasin for another hour ride and went straight to the Tourism office.

At 430pm, Dadi Ronnie, the father of Ate Jam’s baby, frukotots, fetched us in the Provincial Capitol of Maasin and brought us along with his staff, Joseph, to the amazing combination of the cave and the falls.   The view was spectacular and it was probably one of the hardly-visited tourist spots in the area most likely because of difficulty of accessibility.  Luckily, Dadi Ronnie had a Hilux pickup. yippee! travel was a looot easier. Sadly, we cant stay long in the falls since it was already dusk and we had to go back to town. 

For the last stop that day was to Hanginan mountain where Dadi Ronnie has his nipa hut without a wall on one side which gave a magnificent view of Maasin and its beaches.  We ate good dinner there – pancit plus chapseuy, and drank tuba and talked and studied.  it was lights off at 12 midnight.

The next day started at 6am and we went off to hike the whole of hanginan.  it was all majestic views from the mountain top.  we hiked to the church with a known saint in the area to stop for a while and pray. we hike back and arrived at 10am in the hut to prepare to leave for Danao Forest Park.

Danao has a high potential to be great but at this time, it was next to nothing aside from the lake with the nipa.  It, however, gave a great view of all the mountains in Maasin.  And what i cant forget there was the loud whisper of the wind that gently reached our ears.

The five of us (with Dadi Roni and Joseph) went to Maasin port afterwards for a heavy lunch.  and it was a great lunch! lots of chicken wings, pakbit, lumpiang shanghai and overflowing rice! a typical Filipino meal. :)

finally, it was a goodbye to Dadi Roni and Joseph in the Maasin Terminal as they sent us for Matalom trip to visit Canigao.  It was planned initially that we don’t go to the island itself because of high fare rate but just conduct interviews regarding tourism in the island to some boat drivers and some government officials.  but, fortunately, we ended up interviewing the perfect person to bring us to the island at a very low rate. :) the boatman we talked to is a fisherman who unfortunately didn’t catch a single fish on that day so he offered to bring us to canigao and back for only 150pesos. and of course, we agreed. 

And so, my two groupmates were able to see the beautiful canigao and walked on the shore and took good pictures. but unfortunately (again..), we had to leave early to reach the 430pm trip of Vanvans back to Tacloban.

And this van passed us at 430pm and was already full. and this was the last trip. so we again decided to go to Baybay desperately hoping that the last trip leaves later than 6pm. but, our hopes failed us.  the van just left when we arrived at half past 6pm.  the next trip was at 230am and we were left with no choice but to take it.

in order to kill the time, we ate in Mang Inasal in the mall in Baybay and stayed until 9pm.  and went back to the terminal and slept with the poor and the homeless until 2am which was also quite an experience.

i was back home at 430am feeling glad about doing schoolwork and adventure at the same time.

so long Region 8, ill see you again soon!

the answer was right before my eyes.

why did i have to wait for your words?

Follow your dreams, transform your life, take the path that leads to God. Perform your miracles. Cure. Make prophecies. Listen to your guardian angel. Transform yourself. Be a warrior, and be happy as you wage the good fight. Take risks. 

-Paulo Coelho, By the River Piedra, I Sat Down and Wept

of girls and boys

girls will always be girls.
but boys, they can also be assholes.

;)

Manila – A Surprising Surprise

Friday, 8pm, i decided to fly to manila at 6am the following morning for adventure’s sake and for that child in me.

i arrived manila with high hopes but no expectations. but the surprise i intended to give ended up surprising me. and so then the adventure began.

i am mostly in manila at least once a month. so nothing seemed really new. but this time, i wasn’t here for business. i was here for the chase and the adventure and the risk linked with it. and since things didn’t work out as planned, everything went spontaneous.

after arriving from the airport, i went directly to chowking in Taft to eat breakfast. ordered two of the cheapest meal, the plain chao fan, for my cousin and for me.  when we opened our bowls, an amazing surprise, there were three siomais in each. so it was free siomai for us. and i saw that as a good omen. after breakfast, we went somewhere in manila ( name concealed for business purposes) to make sure i earn more than what i spent for this travel. so based on calculation, net profit from visit to follow that little voice in the farthest corner of my soul is Php 12,000 which isn’t bad after all.

i met Ayesha and Bettina next in Vargas Museum in UP Diliman. drank cafe boholano which tastes so good plus the delectable sansrival. and i cried and laughed with them. ate dinner in maxx’s and went to ayesha’s place afterwards for unlimited videoke! and while we sing, i cried and cried again. which was a bit funny actually.

i woke up the following day in a different mood. something with a tinge of adventure and spontaneity. i texted friends and decided then and there what to do. and so lunch was with an organizational head plus a good friend whom i’ve not met for 4 years now. and it was a treat from him in Yellow Cab! spicy chicken wings plus new york’s finest pizza! thank you kuya chad. 

Afterwards, a high school close friend, lomel, asked if i can join him to Market Market to wall climb, a hobby ive never done again since 1 year now. surprisingly, i was still able to finish three walls. these are the tallest wall ive ever climbed!  and it felt so freakin good – to finish them and to finally climb walls again. :P

directly after this,i was invited to go to Alabang Town Center, one of the high-end malls in the region about an hour away from where i was.  i had dinner with an exhousemate and a very dear friend, Rae. she was with her husband, Verge and a good friend, Brian. and we talked about crazy and green stuff which actually made my day. :) we ate dinner in Pepper Rice and chitchatted all night long.  It was good to see her again knowing that she’ll be leaving for good to California on Wednesday. makes me want to feel like this travel was just a blessing in disguise.

i arrived in Makati in Glorietta 5 at 11pm to be able to spend some time contemplating on everything and doing academic stuff.  I stayed until 2am in Bos Coffee to wait for my flight back at 420am.

and so the journey ends.

although the trip didn’t go the way i wanted, it still turned out to be something i wouldn’t regret doing. i won’t be young forever. might as well live the life i can – spontaneous and carefree. this may have brought me tears, but it was worth the peace of mind that i got from the experience – no regrets, no what-ifs nor what-could-have-beens, only what-is.  

hello blog. we meet once again.

hello summer..

hello blog.