every man bleeds

bettina’s one month old dell laptop and two touch screen cell phones got stolen from her room.

on the same day, henning’s surf board broke. and while this was happening, somebody stole his phone.

this happened the next day i got stabbed in my dreams.

every man bleeds.

in dreams

it was night time. 

the place was dark. there were lights from the streetlight but was hindered by the trees from illuminating the streets. i was wearing a red shirt and the shoulder bag which ate bing bought from Italy. i was walking with someone i could not recognize who. as we turned the curve in the street, we were suddenly surrounded by  teenage gangsters. about two or three of them grabbed my bag and ran away. the contents flashed in my mind - the quite big amount of money in my wallet, my phones which contained important information and other important papers. but before i was able to do anything, one boy stabbed me with a knife at the back. i did not feel the pain. i just know that something sharp was behind me. slowly, he held me until i fell lying on the floor and he ran towards his friends. i was struggling to shout for help. but only my mind worked. i thought that i have to save all the energy to stay alive. the last thing i saw was my companion calling for help. and  then everything went blurred and gone. i could only here the noise around. i was alone. waiting. waiting for the sound of help coming. i felt my blood escaping me. then my senses left me. i was gone.

at the moment i died in my dreams, i woke up in the same position i had in that dream. it was dark. my eyes were struggling for light. at that point, i doubted if i was alive.

in that dream, i felt how it felt to be stabbed. i felt the panic. the flash of events in my mind in nanoseconds. i felt the struggle to stay alive. i felt how my senses left one by one. i felt how i waited even in the last moment of my life. i felt how life escaped me.

everything seemed real. in my dreams, it was real. i hope to live longer.

words

words are all illusion.
they were never real.

on words

words are the only weightless thing that can actually make someone feel so heavy.

business is up when the heart is down.
the world is just fair.

of notes and scribbles

november 20, 2010.

notes and scribbles.

of elations and desperations.

of laughter and tears.

of loving and letting go.

of learning and yearning.

of roller coaster rides and marshmallows.

of chips and spices.

of rainbows and rain.

of stars and angels.

of heaven and hell.

and of everything else in between.